PHPNews

Test Etiquette

Fig 1: A brigade of woobles, apparently Today, we're going to talk about testfest, in case you have no idea what that is, here is an excerpt from the website : Have you ever wanted to contribute to PHP but have been afraid that your C skills aren’t up for the challenge? Well, have no fear! If you know PHP, you …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Wednesday November 8, 2017


Expanding Horizons

Fig 1. My view of the horizon this morning. Recently I have been working on a new extension . It is a wrapper around libui , which is a cross platform user interface development library, that allows the creation of native look and feel interfaces in the environments it supports. The gravitas of this may not …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Wednesday November 2, 2016


me et mentis morbum

Fig 1. What I aspire to be ... This morning, I want to talk about mental illness ... and apologize. The preceding sentence was rewritten 42 times, and contains the words from the first revision. In some sense, it is difficult to use the words "mental illness" when we are talking about ourselves. There is a kind …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Monday September 26, 2016


Breaking Badly

If you're not running PHP 7 already, you are either crazy, or else your unit tests rely on software that I wrote for PHP 5 ... uopz . uopz is a runtime hacking extension of the runkit and scary stuff genre. When I first wrote uopz, PHP 5 was almost in a state of equilibrium. There were minor changes effecting the …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Wednesday April 13, 2016


Hacking PHP 7

Recently, I have taken part in some screen casts with my good friends at 3devs . The subject of the screen casts are extension development for , and hacking PHP 7 ( Part 1 , Part 2 ). Screen casting is a medium I haven't mastered, or had very much practice at. While I'm trying to plan the content for the show, I …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Tuesday March 15, 2016


Picking an Approach

Fig 1. Several Languages I should hope that the majority of people reading this consider themselves polyglots. A polyglot is a person able to speak in many languages; It's almost a requirement of programming that we should know more than one language. Using the right language for the job is a worthy aspiration to …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Wednesday March 2, 2016


Chasing the Dragon

Fig 1. Man chasing Dragon. It's no secret that, I am an addict ... I'm allowed to assume that if you are reading my blog, about programming, you too are an addict. All of the time I am awake, I chase the ultimate high ... that high is ... making computers do stuff. We probably both have a problem ... I've always …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Monday February 8, 2016


Internal Law

Fig 1. Lady Justice For all of the last two decades, internals has functioned without any kind of agreement between participants regarding how we should conduct discourse, or how we should represent the project in the community. Recently, our good friend Anthony Ferrara submitted a request for comments on a …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Saturday January 9, 2016


APC and Me

Fig1. An APC logo. When it was decided that Zend's Optimizer Plus would be merged into PHP, APC was already in a pretty poor state, there hadn't been a stable release for quite some time. We were moving towards having a built in (abandoned in php-src/ext) opcode caching solution but it was not obvious that APC …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Friday November 20, 2015


The Problem with Caching

Fig 1. Stampeding Elephants. We cache things to avoid unnecessary load on our servers. It might therefore surprise you to learn that when you are most vulnerable, the kind of shared memory cache that is APC(u) will stab you in the face ... APC(u) has had stampede protection for a long time, however, it is …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Thursday November 12, 2015


Help Required with Broken Things

Fig 1. A priceless artefact from antiquity. Humans are a terrible bunch; Give them ancient, priceless artefacts to care for, and they'll snap the beards off them and stick them back together with pound shop (99c store) epoxy. In August 2014, that literally happened. Apparently, the museum has world class …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Tuesday November 10, 2015


The Worth of Advice

Fig 1. An extremely confusing sign I've written on my blog , spoken in my talk, told strangers on the train: You should not use multi-threading at the front end of a web application, it does not make sense when the threading model is 1:1. Regardless of the fact that I wrote pthreads, and I know very well what …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Tuesday September 22, 2015


What Polly Really Wants

Fig 1. Definition of polyfill according to Wikipedia I think that a rather narrow definition, nevertheless it shows the origin of the word to be specifically Javascript and client side development. Slowly but surely, this has become part of the PHP vernacular, everyone has heard of password_compat . A polyfill …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Tuesday September 15, 2015


Addendum: Letter from the Future

Fig 1. Some PHP7 logos A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about my efforts to port pthreads to PHP7 , to make it worthy of the shiny new platform. Work continued on pthreads, and today I'm going to take the opportunity to update my previous blog post with some correction and extension. With PHP7 in RC2, I'm sure …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Tuesday September 8, 2015


A Letter from the Future

Fig 1. A sign post to the future (unverified). The last few months have been a hectic time in the life of a PHP extension developer.: PHP7 approaches fast, with the first Release Candidate already out in the wild. PHP7 probably feels like the future to you, but it's my here and now ... I wonder if that makes me a …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Tuesday August 25, 2015


The Universe is NOT Aware

Fig 1: Part of the universe I'm very mindful of speaking clearly, when I think people might be listening. It's extremely important to communicate ideas precisely, so that they can be understood with minimal effort on the part of your audience. In my parallel PHP podcast and talk, and a previous blog post, I gave …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Tuesday July 28, 2015


One of Them

FIG 1: Me, and my beard, talking at a conference. In real life, I'm a pretty awkward guy at first; I'm prone to stuttering, have no sense of direction, I forget names, the faces of people I've met, places I've been, and find it impossible to be assertive, or confident in any way. I'm pretty much a mess. Some of …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Wednesday July 22, 2015


20 Years of PHP

On this day, 20 years ago, PHP version 1.0 debuted to the world; It was a way of escaping the horror of writing your CGI programs in Perl, or worse, with your own bespoke set of C functions (that you wrongly referred to as a framework internally). You probably wouldn't recognize code from that era: Hey, you are …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Monday June 8, 2015


20 Years of PHP

On this day, 20 years ago, PHP version 1.0 debuted to the world; It was a way of escaping the horror of writing your CGI programs in Perl, or worse, with your own bespoke set of C functions (that you wrongly referred to as a framework internally). You probably wouldn't recognize code from that era: Hey, …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Monday June 8, 2015


Mocking PHP

Fig 1. Some kind of horrific monkey-muppet-tellytubby hybrid. Much to the dismay of every RoR fanboy that ever lived, I'm not going to break character and start mocking PHP in the literal, playground sense. I'm talking, of course, about mocking internal PHP functions and methods, so that we can test code that …

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Written by Krakjoe - - Aggregated on Monday January 12, 2015